Friday, March 8, 2013

Super Kawaii Food Fun Time Oishii Show!

Onigiri Rabbits and a Heart Filled with Smoked Salmon and Topped with Furikake

Why so serious? Ya know, I subscribe to a lot of fancy food magazines and blogs and whatnot and the one thing that has always troubled me is the omnipresent snobby, richy rich snobbery (whether the writers are well off or not). Look I don't care if you sleep in a water bed filled with gold teeth and use thousand dollar bills to light your cigars. Good for you. I'm just tired of the snotty attitude that mainstream food writers have adopted. I could give a shit that you hand picked horned unicorn lobsters™ off the coast of Malta on one of your weekend getaways. That's great and all but it doesn't make you any better and happier than us poor saps who have to stoop to buying a fresh lobster down at the pier or at your local endangered species black market. All levels of food are worthwhile and every time some asshole turns their nose up at a hot dog octopus a baby kitten dies of erotic asphyxiation. No lie.

Octopus Hot Dogs Floating in a Sea of Ramen

I love bento. Japanese boxes filled with cute and tasty things. Fried squid eyes and heart shaped gelatinous shark taints are my personal favorite. Okay, I lied about that but I really do love bentos. Housewives in Japan take it very seriously when they pack their children's lunch bento. Onigiri, rice shaped into popular characters like Hello Kitty or Rilakkuma. Meat shaped into sea creatures and vegetables turned into jaunty hats. "My child must have the most kawaii bento or I will have shamed the family." Serious stuff.

Have fun with your food. It should be tasty and super kawaii! There's a time and a place for serious food (like at funerals, attempted poisonings, and at the opera) but there is also a desperate need for people in the food world (and the non-food world) to lighten up a little. Pull that skewered lobster tail out of your ass and have a little fun once in a while (unless of course you have that lobster skewer up there for fun in the first place). Let the Japanese learn you a thing or two. Cute food tastes better. It's a known fact. Yeah, you can eat a hot dog but wouldn't it be better if your hot dog was a dapper cephalopod? Of course it would be! Why have plain old curry rice when instead you could have rice shaped into a bear drowning in a tasty brown curry lake while holding onto a custardy egg "lifeboat" with chicken nugget "squirrels" dancing on top. Exactly. Life is short. Play with your food. xoxo

This video isn't mine but look how adorable this Rilakkuma bento is. Kawaii!!!!!!!!!!!


Dennis K. said...

Octopus wieners in my bento box brings back some serious nostalgic memories for me, haha.

Violet Séverine said...

Yay! I love them and wish I had them when I was little. Sigh. I'll just have to make them now. ;)